Closing 2024... Christmas and Winter Season

Christmas and Winter 2024

Closing out the year…

As the winter season begins and the end of the year

begins to close, book-ended by the Holidays, and the

Holiday Season, I reflect on having a roof over my

head this year, though, not the roof I would have

chosen or preferred, it is still a roof over my head

and a reprieve from being forced to live on the

streets like I had been forced to do for so long,

nearly half my life was spent on the streets,

my life stripped from me and taken.

A life in Full-surround sound and video.

Our lives the Feature film for all to see and hear,

where admission for the public is always free, but

at our expense. Every moment of our lives on

running video, spied on 24/7, with no down time.

So, the shift to caring for an elderly gentleman to

get off the streets for his care, is something I am

truly thankful for. But it is a mixed blessing.

Still have no space to just BE. No privacy.

The cons tend to overshadow the pros. But I am

able to finally shelve all the horror of the streets

and the endless nightmare it was and put it out

of reach for now. The harassment of just being

present, gone. That brings light to my heart with

hope for going forward. Though, I can never erase

what being on the streets was, or what I went

through, or the effects it had on me,

the residues of it remain.

Something I will never be able to wash from

my body or memory, as it is so intricately woven

through the fabric of my soul. Indelibly fused

to every fiber of by being.

Mentally and physically, I am still in the space

of being on the street, even though I have been

off the streets for a while now, I still feel like

I am out there. And I know at any moment,

that very well may be the case, again.

Holidays are not a pleasant time for me. I hate

the heavy, thick parking lot traffic everywhere,

the frantic frenzy of everyone, the rushing to

go and be and do 2 seconds faster than

everyone else. All of it just wears me down

and wears me out. Drains me on every level.

I hate the mass packed crowds, the deafening

volume all around. Have just never been a fan

of the Holidays. I dread this time of year. But

I am thankful and have a tremendous amount

to be grateful for. I am focusing on the

good as best as I can.

Being inside as the year comes to a close

is a first in a very long time.

Finally able to close, at least temporarily,

that chapter and finish the book. The book was

quite long and it never felt like it would

finish, the ending nowhere in sight,

just went on and on and on.

So, a New book begins and the pages

are already filling up.

Closing 2024…

The Next Chapter

A Very Seasoned Life... Holiday and Winter Season 2021

A Very Seasoned Life....

22 Seasons … 22 Winter and Holiday Seasons

of Life.... Living on the streets

Entering into the Holiday and Winter Season of 2021. And the starts

of my 22^ndWinter and Holiday Season OUTSIDE, living on the streets.

Forced to live in the raw brutality of being outside 24/7 from the turn

of the Century continues and the History being erased along the way.

Twenty-Two Seasons living in and through the Shadow Box of Life, of

Humanity. Seasoned and Simmered Season after endless season....

of Dashed Hopes, Empty Promises...living in the ruins of Society.

This is supposed to be the most Festive and greatest time of the year....

but living and breathing the streets for so long, I feel no excitement

about the Winter and Holiday Season currently underway.

Another Holiday Season that is Subdued... The Excitement

not lifting the air with the electric pulse as it used to and is once

again muted because of the Manufactured Pandemic and Forced Covid

Injections, along with the never-ending “Variants” while aggressively pushing

“Boosters” forcefully and continuing imposed restrictions; must receive

all the injections in order to be allowed into Life.... anywhere

and for everything. To do anything, to go anywhere;

Dining, movies, events (Concerts, Fair, Clubs, Parties, Gyms,

Gatherings of any kind),

Any place and every place where people are...

we are forced to get the Covid Injections, then required to

show Proof of Injections, Everywhere. I Refuse.

Life was already limited on the streets, now completely OFF LIMITS

for even the barest essentials. No longer allowed to live, in any

regard. Life has become unsustainable, unlivable, untenable.

It has become a stew of Hate and Contempt, that is Unforgiving,

Harsh and every word and action has to be fake, inauthentic...

and Politically Correct.

Leaving the Festive Holiday air Deflated and Muted. The

Vibrancy removed, the Festive feel no longer there.

But Holidays are just days, like all the rest.

Spent exactly like all the rest; alone, outside.

The only thing about the Season that affects me, is the weather

and Life, or the remains of what had once been a life.

When your life is cast off to the wayside like trash and debris,

and the Services that are supposed to be there, are non-existent,

Hope Shrivels and the lights Dim.... While the Echoes of Humanity

diminish further into the Peripheral abyss.

Holidays, Seasons, Birthday.... No matter the day, or time of year,

it all feels the same, regardless. But on the Holidays, finding open,

available restrooms to use and cleanup in become more of a

challenge, as well as finding food to eat when most, if not all

places are CLOSED.

Hardships remain, no matter the time of year. And being outside

24/7, makes those much more pronounced. Survival becomes

your Default mode, every moment of day and all throughout the night.

Being on high alert and not being able to let your guard down.

Life is different when it's lived Outside. Having to take everything

into account; Weather, Safety, Food, Shelter, what is open,

what is closed, restroom access and availability; plus, so much

more that consumes life in every regard.

Holidays just make that harder to complete.

The Devastating Toll living on the streets has on your body, your life,

your health and spirit.... is incomprehensible. It leaves scars that will

never heal, like permanent stains that cannot be removed.

Twenty-two Holiday Seasons, twenty-two Winter Seasons...

that is how long I have been on the streets and counting.

With untold more to follow in its wake. That is how long I have

been forced to live, or rather merely exist behind the fumes

of Humanity, on the streets, outside 24/7, without a home.

Family Traditions, visiting friends and family, food, conversation....

None of that holds when your life is on the streets. It becomes a

Tradition of ONE, no visitations (aside from Law Enforcement),

there are no friends or family or warmth... no food (Not in the

traditional sense of what Holiday Food includes...), and

conversations are usually one-sided. Mine, I share with my

notebook and pen, and the many of Nature's Beautiful

furry and feathered friends She brings my way.

But life on the streets has its own nuances.

You are surrounded in Surround Sound, every

moment, of Nature's Chorus.

22 Seasons of having my Hopes lifted, then crushed and Deflated... time

and again. 22 Seasons of living on the edge of Life, in the truest sense.

22 Seasons of being Deserted, Discarded and Forgotten about. 22 Seasons of

unanswered prayers. 22 Seasons of the Unforgiving elements and the hard,

cold ground forever awaiting my presence to resume in the space.

22 Seasons removed from my life.... Taken from me. Time that

I was denied Living in a real, substantial capacity.

Life, my life, shredded into unrecognizable shards, where

threads and particles are all that is left, where there once had

been a living, feeling human being. Now, nothing more than the

sum of what was left behind, taken by force, stolen, ruined and

destroyed. A life in tatters, from the continual

storms of the brutality of life.

Twenty-two Seasons of Living on the Streets.

Seasons of DECADES of Life without a Home.

Holidays 2021

Holiday Traditions... 2020

 

Holiday Traditions.... On the Streets

2020... Through the Forced Lockdown

Twenty-One Seasons.... of Holidays and Winters Outside

Twenty-One Winters living without a home. Twenty-One Holiday

Blends outside. Seasoning into Life... that is out-skirted

to the outer banks of Society, to the furthest edges of Humanity.... 

Thanksgiving on the streets.. Christmas on the Streets...

New Year's on the Streets. And every Holiday

throughout the year, on the streets.

Holidays are not steeped in tradition living on the streets. But the air

takes on a different feel; electric and vibrant, as though its own heartbeat

pulses with excitement. Where the Air becomes alive with Promise.

While I'll never be grateful for being forced to live on the streets because of the

illegal actions of a despicable landlord, living on the streets teaches you about resilience,

how to improvise and use what you have around you, teaches you how to persevere

through the worst of life... and do much more. There is no way to prepare for and

nothing that prepares you for street life, even when fully immersed in it.

Life.... Disintegrating before my eyes... on the streets. The Nightmare that never Ends.

When is enough enough? Most of my life now having being

totally and entirely consumed....

if not fully devoured, on the streets, where days become one

that mirrors every one before, and all the ones after. Hard enough to

have to live indefinitely outside, without a home. But with the

forced Lockdown, and all the Health destroying, damaging Mandates,

Guidelines and Protocols, have turned that nightmare of life on the streets into

something straight out the of Bowels of Hell, and through the worst “Horror Show”

that could ever be Conceived. Makes a Stephen King Novel look more

like a Children's Bedtime story, in comparison.

This has been the absolute worst Holiday Season I have ever spent on the streets,

hands down. And being out here for 21 of them now, that is saying A LOT.

Soul Crushing, Life destroying. All Hope, All Joy, All Spirit Lifting moments....

Just wiped out. Much like our Health continues to be at the hands of the

Tyrannical Government ordering our lives, in every sense of the word,

under their complete forced control.... using their Mouthpieces of their

Design; The WHO (Government Funded and the biggest Financial backer;

Bill Gates) and the CDC (Backed and funded by the Government,

to tell us only what they want us to hear, and not what the truth is.

Ending 2020 in the Worst ways.... and starting 2021 the same. Everything has been

taken from us.... Our Health, Our Bodies, Our Lives. How we Live, Where we Go,

How we Communicate, and WHEN and with Who, while being forced to

wear Suffocating, unbreathable face diapers called “Face Masks”,

that severe Oxygen out of our existence.

Our Freedoms, Civil Liberties, Our rights Guaranteed under the

Constitution.... Our rights to LIVE and Breathe freely....

All of it forcibly taken from us.

So no, this Holiday Season has not been what Holidays were meant to be,

wrong in every regard, has been erased. Where No contact is allowed.

Our Lives have become Forbidden to Live in any and all regard.

The Holiday air was muted this year. It didn't have that Alive and Electric feel.

But rather just felt dead. This year was wiped of any Traditions, because

Holidays were not allowed to be Celebrated or be a Gathering of any kind.

Travel was banned and just being anywhere forcibly banned.

The Holidays were one of Hell.... Filled to the Brim.

Our Tax Dollars hard at work!

A Holiday Season where Holidays were not permitted.

And the Worst Holiday Season experienced.