New Year's 2026... A New Beginning

New Year’s 2026

A New Beginning…

As 2025 has closed and 2026 is now unfolding,

I reflect back on the Quarter of a Century that

just ended. All I experienced, witnessed and went

through, all the volumes; volumes of which

could fill several libraries….

The entirety of this Century spent in the mere existence

on the periphery of humanity, on the streets, forced out

by and through the illegal actions of a despicable

landlord. Life has thrown me more than a few rough

patches, to say the least. My entire life hijacked

in the worst ways one could ever imagine.

That Temporary Street closure, looks like

it may be re-opening once again in the not too

distant future. And I am not looking forward

to any of it. Going back into the RAW of life.

Though, I am deeply grateful for the reprieve of being

off the streets, however briefly, with the in-home care.

It has given me a little room to BREATHE, but my

head remains on constant swivel.

But it will be going back out with no protection.

For so many years on the streets, that was the case.

It had only been the last few years of being on the

streets that protection came in the form of a vehicle.

Long since taken from me by and through the

actions of another, leaving me to pay the heavy,

hard price of their actions.

Having no lifeline and no mobility has imposed

great limits and heavy restrictions on everything

in my life, but even more so with what little income

I have coming in, which is partial SSI, supposed

to be full disability, but that is another way the

state and government screwed with me.

Battled them for over 16 years before finally being

approved, after more than a decade and a half of being

continually denied. They waited until the State disability

from previous employment had expired before finally

approving me for much less than what

I was fully entitled to receive.

Spoke with several lawyers, one of whom was referred

to me 3 times, all of whom refused to take my case,

telling me my case was too involved. Meaning they

would need to actually do some kind of work to earn

their hefty fees. None of whom were willing to do so.

And without transit to go to their forced “audits”,

where they shred and rip apart my life in every which

way they possibly can, citing it is to make sure I still

“qualify” to receive my income, when my status and

physical challenges are permanent and have not

just magically disappeared, nor will they ever.

Ransacking my life endlessly for

absolutely no good reason.

SSI continues its threats about stopping my only

source of income unless I go in person to their office

way over in Hayward. And it poses several challenges

for doing so; having no way to check my mail regularly,

for their required forced in-person audits that they send by

mail, except on foot. I cannot check my mail every day,

or every week, due to the distance and my being on

foot by and through the actions of another.

The impact of another’s actions rippling and

reverberating through every aspect of my life.

The New Year is supposed to be a New Start, a New

Beginning. That simply has not been the case. Finding

the help and support nowhere to be found. Having

doors slammed hard in my face, no matter

where I turn. Nothing there.

Being on foot makes it a real challenge trying to

take care of anything. My life forced onto the sidelines,

a permanent by-stander in my own life, which has

created a plethora of issues not being able to do

what I need to. There is a long list of things I need to

get to, that cannot wait indefinitely for me

to get to. Then having no one to help

no matter where you turn.

Checking my mail, grocery shopping, taking care

of essentials, going to appointments, volunteering,

donating my time and skills, or donating food that

I cannot eat or clothing that I no longer wear or

need, just to name a few things that being without

a vehicle not only makes more than challenging,

but impossible to take care of the bulk of.

Spending a great deal of time walking everywhere,

getting very little, if anything, accomplished.

Putting more miles on my feet, quite literally, than

most people do their cars, just to take care of the

barest of bare essentials; checking my mail, which

is about a 13 mile walk round-trip, grocery shopping

is every day, all week long, being able to only walk so

far and carry only so much. And that is only when

weather permits. More often than not, the grocery

trips are a huge waste of time, as the store,

whichever one I make it to, is generally out

of what it was I went for.

Something people simply cannot fathom,

that a Homeless person on the streets

for so long could possibly have anything to

take care of that is of any import. Yes, survival

takes center stage, and finding some place, any

place, to take care of the barest essentials

become all consuming, nothing goes away,

not the problems or responsibilities, it all just

gets rearranged and shifted to include the

additional ones brought on as a direct

result of being on the street.

Being forced to live on the streets does not

extinguish any problems, it just adds a whole lot

more to the mix; A much more challenging

mix to contend with.

Being without a lifeline and mobility, is

a prison worse than death.

Your life is suspended, permanently

suspended and cut off from life itself.

As the New Year begins to unfold, excitement

does not fill me, just a sense of dread while

struggling with gratitude. I am filled with

gratitude one moment, then Life crashes

into me and reality sets and settles back in.

Such a wonderful way to start the New Year!!

New Year 2026