Drifting...

~ Drifting~

Drifting…. That is what you find yourself doing when you are forced

to live every moment on the streets…. Drifting from one place to another,

with no specific direction in mind, since any direction takes you to the same place,

just a different location. The experience remains intact, no matter where you drift to.

When you are not welcome wherever you are….. makes no difference

where you go. And when you live on the streets….. drifting becomes

second nature that just falls into place,

as you have an abundance of experience perfecting the art.

Drifting as life passes you by all around. Like driftwood in a stream or river,

life on the streets takes you in all directions, and usually not of your choosing.

Some cities even take the measures to physically remove the homeless from their cities by

putting us on the bus or Bart (Bay Area Rapid Transit)

to remove us out of the way, when we were doing nothing but minding our

own business, but the cities claiming our presence is

“illegal” and they have “City Ordinances” that prohibit people from

being present when they do not have a physical residence, regardless of where you happen to be….

The park, waiting for a bus or just sitting some place to rest your tired feet, our

presence is unwelcome just for being present and just being.

Drifting becomes even more apparent when you go looking

for the help and assistance that is “supposed” to be there for those on the streets.

But what you find instead of the help when you do not fit the role of the

commercialized version of the homeless in looks, actions, and

behaviour… that “help” bounces you endlessly around, claiming

they don’t have the resources. So you get tossed from one agency

to another, from one community center to churches, to non-profits,

and back. Due to the glaring fact that I am CLEAN, and have never even tried

those life destroying habits that so many do, much less been consumed by them, and

I am not an illegal alien…. That so-called help is why I still find myself without a home.

H E L P….. what a cruel word that imposes on your life when you live on the streets.

Even more so when you are denied and refused because of habits you never

started, and the length of time outside widens

that chasm when the ones that are supposed to be there to help, tell you

repeatedly that your circumstance does not “qualify” as an emergency, and

therefore you do not qualify for any assistance. Putting you

literally between a rock and a hard place, in the truest sense.

Denied and refused the help you need to

move forward, while being denied your existence that has never

qualified for the assistance needed. So drifting becomes a very real

part of your life...as life has left you no choice to do otherwise.

With life on the streets, more bad seems to overshadow the good.

But there is some good you find along the way.

Watching the sunrises, morning after morning…..

year after endless year... when it isn’t raining, foggy or overcast.

Being surrounded by Nature and Her beauty and incredible loving furry and

feathered friends, who have opened their world to me, time and again.

In fact, Nature’s magnificent creatures who share my days and nights,

are the only ones who have ever accepted me as me.

That in and of itself is the greatest gift.

Animals…. Mother Nature’s perfect companion.