The Bowels of Life...
Life on the Street
Living on the
streets... means living in the sewers of
the gutters of life.
When you are forced out to the street,
it is literally being sent
into the Bowels of life itself.
No crueler punishment.
Life being turned
upside down, and inside out, going from living
to barely existing, in
the shadows, and becoming shadowy statues
that no longer exist in
any meaningful way, where you are not
allowed to be where you
are, no matter where you happen
to be. Your presence is
“Illegal” and your criminal activity
is merely being
visible. Where you are hard to miss,
but easy to ignore, as
we are not seen as
Living, breathing, Feeling
Beings.
Days lose their meaning
and no longer has any
value, as every day
looks and feels like all the rest,
While Your very life
becomes an Intrusion.
You witness,
experience, endure things no one should
as a direct result of
being forced to live on the streets.
Living on the streets,
you quickly become an afterthought
that is Beside the
point. Those moveable, shadowy icons...
shadow statues, where
Learning how to live when you are not
allowed to BE
anywhere. You the learn the fine art of
Invisibility, becoming
part of the Scenery, blending in so well,
that it is hard to tell
where one ends and the other begins.
Part of the Landscape,
that was painted and sculpted
in place, losing your
“Human” status when living on the street.
For some reason, when
you no longer have that Verifiable,
Proof of Living in a
Residence, you are no longer seen or
Viewed as a Living, Breathing
Human Being.
You literally cease to
exist in the truest sense
when you no longer have
those walls surrounding
you and the roof
overhead. You lose your “Living”
status. Diminished,
restricted, confining...
Invisibility has become
my Specialty.
Collecting dust like a
Shadow Box on the wall.
Yet, we are not to be
seen or heard from. You find yourself
searching for LIFE....
and how to find your way back inside of it,
and back inside. But instead of finding your way back inside,
you find yourself
sucked into a Black Hole that becomes
Vacuum Sealed that
swallows you WHOLE.
You are blamed for things
that have taken place, for what's
going on and happening
or has happened... just being in the
vicinity is proof
enough that we are to blame for the standing
discarded trash, the thefts,
robberies, assaults, vandalism...
Discarded as waste,
where the Human element
is completely removed.
You are repeatedly lied
to by “Service Providers”, the police,
and organizations that
are supposed to be there to help.
Your integrity is
always held suspect and questioned.
When anything happens
to you and you report it, the
reports are “misfiled”
and lost, discarded into the trash,
because after all...
what do you expect “putting yourself out
here like that?” Yeah,
like something I did, not something
I was forced into. I did not choose to be out here,
but have been forced to become a permanent
resident
of the streets because
of the illegal actions of a
despicable landlord,
paying the price for his
illegal actions against
me.
No one dreams of living
on the streets, especially
not as a permanent
resident, yet, those are the only dreams
I have now... living on
the street because I have been out
here nearly half my
life, and nearly a Quarter of a Century,
merely existing around
the periphery of life itself.
On the exhaust fumes of
Humanity.
You get sucked into the
depths of the Black Hole
of the streets...
Living on the streets takes a
tremendous toll on your
body, heart, mind and soul...
in the most devastating
ways that are literally
unimaginable, that is
until you are living it and
experiencing every
moment of it.
Living on the streets
ages you decades.... long before
nature would. And does
so, unsparingly. . I went from
being carded all the
time, to automatically being given
“Senior Discounts”
without knowing it until I received the
receipts and checked
it. It is one of the hazards of being
forced to live in a
circumstance not of your choosing
and not having the rest
or nutrition your body needs and
requires, but is
readily deprived of. Everyone now assumes
I am a Senior Citizen,
giving me 'Senior” discounts
automatically, never
asking me if I am, yet continually
“carded” by the police
just being present, minding my
own business and some
jerk calls in on me for that
very fact, just being
present and visible.
The challenge of
finding restrooms to use...
of just taking care of
essentials. Of finding food.
Safe places to stay
through the night... is an
endless cycle that just
loops and repeats, and
fully consumes every
moment of your day.
Being out in the
elements every moment of the
day and all through the
night, every day of the year
takes a tremendously
hard toll on your body,
on your health, on your
life and in all you do.
A permanent wardrobe is
wrapped around you living on
the streets... but not
of clothes. But one of Labels, categories,
classifications, etc.
You are grouped as a whole that affects
everything you do and
everywhere you go. Living on the
streets colors
everything you do. It consumes your life,
follows you in your
dreams, while you live every moment of
your life on the Public's
Movie Screen, where admission
is always free to the movie goers, at Our Expense.
Carrying the weight of Life, and your Life
with you every step.
Your life and every
facet of it becomes Public Domain.
Where privacy has been
completely erased in every
regard, no matter how
private your business. Everything,
absolutely Everything,
you do is on the Public Movie
Screen of Life. Where
nothing is off limits.
And your life is
Swallowed Whole into and through
The Bowels of Life
living on the streets.
