Birthday
Notes to Myself....
Reflections
of Life on the Streets
Another
birthday on the streets…. Blending into just another day,
like
any other… and a replica of the past 18 I have experienced
on
the streets, outside, without a home.
August
15….
Birthdays,
like Holidays, have never really held any meaning.
Especially
when you have no one to share them with, and each and
every
one of them are outside, by yourself, and there is nothing
memorable
about them. It’s just another day on the streets,
and
a day that is easily forgettable.
My
18th Birthday on the streets. And an 18th
Birthday is supposed to
reflect
and show that you have become an adult and are now afforded
more
of what life offers, while you take on increasing responsibility.
An
18th Birthday is a Milestone and Turning Point in a
person's life.
You
are given the gift of becoming a contributing member of society,
while
being
allowed and expected to do your Civic Duties that are imposed on you
whether
you want it or not; like being served to Jury Duty, voting
(which
is a moot point, as votes are as worthless as expecting to
grow rich by throwing money in the trash, and discarded while the
Governments do whatever they choose, regardless).
grow rich by throwing money in the trash, and discarded while the
Governments do whatever they choose, regardless).
In
essence, you are legally liable for your actions, and for your
life...
how
you act, respond, and present yourself.
But
this isn't that kind of birthday. Yes, it is my 18th
birthday,
Living
on the Streets, without a permanent residence, but not my
true
18th Birthday in Life.
I
have long since passed that boundary of restriction to more freedom,
many
times over. But an 18th Birthday.... living, breathing
and feeling
every
moment on the streets.
Rights
that are guaranteed with our birth and the age of which our Civic
Duties
take hold, are rights that are taken away from you and denied
when you
have no “Verifiable Physical Residence” to prove you live in the
right
place, and have citizenship, not to mention required to have
Utility
Statements and Phone Bills going to the
Physical
Address in your name.
Our
rights to Vote DENIED because they require a
“Verifiable
Physical Residence”, which is highly Unconstitutional.
Our
basic rights of a HUMAN BEING; the Rights to Shelter, Food, and
Clothing
are nothing more than words without meaning when you
have no
H O M E; no place to store, prepare or cook food, no truly
SAFE
place to sleep without being disturbed throughout the
nights
just for being present, having absolutely no privacy at all.
We are
denied checkout privileges from the library because they have
now
imposed different “RULES”
about who they allow to check out
materials,
and who they do not. Now in order to obtain or renew
your
library card, you have to prove you have a
“Verifiable
Physical Residence” where a Utility Bill and Phone Bill and
Bank
Statements go to a PHYSICAL RESIDENCE in your name.
Something
you cannot provide, because you do not have
when you
have no home.
When I
signed up for the Library Card, that “Rule” was not in place,
and
therefore I was able to obtain a Library Card. But they refuse to
allow me
to renew it. My circumstance remains the same as when I signed up,
but now,
not allowed to check out materials due to my circumstance.
Another
Unconstitutional right denied and taken away.
But I
continue to have DREAMS.... and a Continuation of Birthday Wishes....
I have
DREAMS of a Life of Magic... A life that truly matters and
makes
not only a positive difference in others' lives, but makes
a
Beautiful IMPACT, the World over.
But when
dreams and reality remain the same...
Dreams
become just a continuation of waking LIFE. Life on the streets.
There is
no separation. Having no place to go, nowhere to go or any place
to just
BE....is NOT how I dreamed of life, my life, would be. And having
to live
without a home is no way to live, when your life is barely existent.
I've
survived and lived through things you cannot even imagine.
The
horrible, ever-present theme of my life.... being continually denied
and
refused any and all assistance.... and being denied my very identity
right
from birth. Denied and refused my Birth right, my Heritage,
My Blood
Type, who my birth parents were/are. Why I was given up.
Denied
and refused any and all identifying information of who
I was or
where I came from.
These
are not the DREAMS I had ….
I had
dreams of Presence.... Dreams of becoming a Detective
to help
others, Dreams of making a difference in other people's lives....
Dreams
of making the world a much better place for all.
I had
DREAMS of a LIFE that MATTERED.
And
those dreams did not include spending my Birthdays in
oven baking temperatures of 100*+ Degrees, but my birthday will be one
oven baking temperatures of 100*+ Degrees, but my birthday will be one
of the
hottest days of the year, and not in a good way kind of hot.
But
spending yet another Birthday on the streets.... my 18th
Birthday
on the
streets, those dreams evaporated... like steam rising from the heat.
Heading
into my 19th
year Anniversary of living on the streets, life
without
a home and facing my 20th
Holiday and
Winter
Season on the streets.
As Each
passing birthday holds less appeal than the last.
Dreams
now are no more than more of life on the streets...
I can no
longer dream about what no longer exists; a real HOME,
a place
of my OWN, a place to BE without the constant threat of
being
disturbed and having the cops called on me just for the very
fact of
having no place to go.
Reflecting
back and it brings me right back to the very present.
Happy
Birthday, to me....
A Life
From the Streets.
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